CFB: The inaugural 2010 PICK SIX!!! (Live from Flori-duh)

Tebow’s gone, but they remain very…well…Gaytorish.

• You didn’t think I’d forget about the PICK SIX did you???
• Your guide to the best college football match-ups of the week and picking against the spread…
• If only Brew was still taking bets!!!

by Mike Zimmer, College Football Guru

What looked like a rather mundane first week of college football from a distance, reveals some rather good looking match-ups and entertaining games.  Upon arriving and plotting our viewing schedule here at the Florida Garage-Mahal Bunker HQ for the first week of college football, there is a plethora of games to watch and enjoy. 

Big B and I have plotted out a course that includes an entire sheet of the games to view for the entire day.  That includes 7-games between Noon and 3:30pm on the tube, 7-games between 3:30pm and 7pm, 9-games between 7pm and 10pm and 2-late night offerings.  That’s right, we’ll be keeping tabs on no less than 25-games here on 4-TV sets in the Cape Coral, Florida Bunker of Big B’s.

But the best of the day?  The Pick Six?  You knew I wouldn’t go and leave you without a guide to the best games available did you?  Hit the jump and see the best of the best and then some for this first official Saturday of the college football season!!!  DO IT!!! Read the rest of this entry »

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CFB: The rest of my college football previews (because I was a slack ass and ran out of time before the season and need to get it out there…but will still post brief articles about these conferences but it’s technically cheating if I don’t put something down prior to the season now isn’t it?)

Waaaaaaaaaahhhhhh-Hoooooooo!!! College football is BAAAAAACK!!!

• An official record of what I think will happen in each and every conference before the season starts…because as always, I’ve run out of time to post my predictions…
• So what, big whoop, you wanna fight about it???

by Mike Zimmer, College football expert

Alright fine, I’ve gotten behind on my college football previews and the season really kicks off today and I haven’t gotten through all the conferences.  From my previous posts though, no one seems to care that I’ve neglected my duty (he said duty) and has not yet posted any thoughts on said predictions so I’m pretty sure this is just me typing random words and not too many people bothering to note it.  Oh, yeah, I just went there, yeah, I’m crying waaaaaaaahhhh!!!!  Read my web-site waaaaaaaaahhhh!!!

Nah, I’m not crying but come on, no one has anything to say about my predictons?  Really?  I mean, not even a “stop talking about the Sun Belt and post the fucking Big Ten already!!!” was posted though.  In an effort to keep up my intentions of posting about every conference I offer you a brief prediction on each of the remaining conferences that I didn’t get to (I’ll of course make up for the fact that I didn’t fulfill my intentions by making independent brief articles about those conferences soon because I know you ALL want to read them right?).

So without further adu, hit the fucking jump and see who I have finishing where ass hole. Read the rest of this entry »

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CFB: Big Tweleven alignment of divisions announced, Buckeyes, Wolverweenies separated, THE game to be preserved in last week of season (for now)

“You mean we now have to beat them twice a year?”

• Ohio State and Meatchicken head for different divisions in the Big Tweleven’s alignment, but tradition will rule, teams to meet in last week of the regular season…
• So, in other words, in about a decade when Meatchicken is worth a damn again and the damage done by Dick Rod is finally un-done, there is a chance the two teams could meet twice in a season…
• There is basically no rhyme or reason for the football alignment of divisions, this begs the question of whether other sports will be different (such as basketball where Michigan State looks to have an easy romp every year).

by Mike Zimmer, Buckeye

With all the speculation, all the hemming and hawing over, the debates hushed and the dust settling from the Big Tweleven’s decision to align their teams into divisions with the addition of Nebraska to the conference, it doesn’t sound so bad after all.  Except that it is.

Still, this stinks, no matter what.  The thought of not having Ohio State-Meatchicken in the final week of the season was repugnant.  The thought of the two separated and possibly meeting up twice in a year also stinks.  I’m sorry, but as a Buckeyes, I don’t think you should have to beat Meatchicken twice in a season in football under and circumstances.  But now, the potential exists and that sucks.

Worse, the divisions don’t make much sense with Ohio State, Penn State, Wisconsin, Indiana, Illinois and Purdue in one division while Meatchicken, Minnesota, Northwestern, Michigan State, Iowa and new member Nebraska go to the other (http://rivals.yahoo.com/ncaa/football/news?slug=ap-bigten-divisions). Read the rest of this entry »

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CFB: Ohio State will once again wear “alternate” jerseys for the Meatchicken game, all part of Nike’s cash grab in merchandising before the holidays

Ohio State’s “throwback” Pro Combat Uni from Nike, to be worn during the Ohio State-Meatchicken game.

• Like last year, the Buckeyes will have a different look against the Meatchicken Wolverweenies as Nike melds “throwback” and “future” style in a holiday season cash grab…
• Last year’s model that paid homage to the 1954 National Champions was pretty sweet, this year’s version to honor the 1942 National Champions, well…it lacks a little something if you ask me…
• Yes, I will still need to have one of these, since my birthday has passed, you can order now and hold on to them til’ Christmas.

by Mike Zimmer, Selling jersey’s too, just ask.  No, really.

One more time, Nike will force some teams into hideous uniforms in big games.  Just check out the model that Virginia Tech will have to don.  But more importantly, THE Ohio State Buckeyes will also wear the Nike ProCombat series uniforms for a big game, in fact, the biggest game, against Meatchicken at seasons end.  Just like last year where the Buckeyes had a “throwback” style uniform that paid homage to the 1954 National Championship winning team, Ohio State will wear yet another uniform in the back to the future style (http://rivals.yahoo.com/ncaa/football/blog/dr_saturday/post/Nike-s-Pro-Combat-unis-are-awesome-and-or-a-mo?urn=ncaaf-266668).

Of course, I’m not as big a fan of this get-up as I was with last year’s model after getting a look at it.  The motif is in the 1942-retro style number and team colors which includes a red helmet shell but once again gets “Nike-ied” with all sorts of futuristic trim.  But trust me, they’re not as bad as some of the other horrible looking uniforms that will be worn by other Nike schools such as TCU, Miami of Florida and Pitt.  You can see all of them here (http://www.nike.com/nikeos/p/usnikefootball/en_US/).

While I’m not big on the idea or concept of THE Ohio State Buckeyes even messing with tradition and the tried and true awesomeness that is the regular Buckeyes uniform, these aren’t so bad considering some of the other schools involved and the propensity for schools to try different looks from time to time.  The Buckeyes have no need to do such a thing with perhaps one of the best looks in all of college football.  However, if it has to be made, I’m not so horrified by these duds just like last year.  While not a fan of it per-say, the fact is, I must have one.  Yes, I am a slave to Ohio State Buckeyes fashion.

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BREAKING NEWS: Big Tweleven set to announce divisional line-ups tonight

I don’t know why they don’t use my term…Tweleven.

• Rumors about Big Ten alignment has reached fever pitch, and apparnetly they’re ready to announce who will be where…
• My thought is that Penn State joins Ohio State in one division while Meatchicken is shipped to another…
• Conference set to ruin perhaps the best rivalry in all of sports by moving the Buckeyes and Wolverweenies to seperate divisions, keeping them from playing at seasons end.

by Mike Zimmer, Buckeye

Rumors have been swirling, and apparently today the Big Ten will announce ther alignment of teams into divisions when Nebraska joins the conference next season (http://rivals.yahoo.com/ncaa/football/news?slug=ap-bigten-divisions).

The scuttlebutt has been all about the Ohio State-Meatchicken rivalry and how the league intends to deal with keeping the tradition of the two schools meeting alive.  As is, they’ve met in their final game every year since 1943 and it’s been a tradition that has come full circle into the greatest rivalry game in all of sports.  However, with the divisional alignments, more than likely separating the two teams, it wil then cause the league to move that game in an effort from ever having the two teams play two weeks in a row for the Big Ten crown.  Which, to me, sucks ass.

As it is, my thought is that Meatchicken will move to the “West” Divison with Wisconsin, Minnesota, Iowa, Nebraska and Northwestern.  Meanwhile, Ohio State, Penn State, Michigan State, Illinois, Indiana and Purdue would fill out the other “East” Division.  Which to me, makes no sense what-so-ever in a league that is tradition rich and could do sooooo much better. Read the rest of this entry »

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CFB: BYU going Independent afterall, bolts Mountain West, bolts to West Coast Conference in basketball

BYU takes a shit on the Mountain West.

• BYU is set to leave the Mountain West after all, bolts to Independent status in football, basketball joins smaller WCC…
• University takes big risk striking out on their own, shits on the Mountain West in the process as God TV wins over conference…
• Good luck filling out your dance card you non-oral sex having Cougar freaks.

by Mike Zimmer, Loves Lutheran Jesus

According to their website and reports all over the intergooglewebnets, the Brigham Young Cougars are set to jump ship from the Mountain West Conference, going Independent in football and to the smaller West Coast Conference in basketball (http://rivals.yahoo.com/ncaa/football/news?slug=ap-byu-independent).

After originally rumored to be re-thinking their bailing out on the Mountain West when the league cut them off at the WAC pass by adding Nevada and Fresno State, BYU will leave the league and go it alone in football and smaller in basketball.  The move is widely rumored to be tied to the universities want to make BYU-TV, which is full of Mormon programming to be the satellite blow torch for their football games and convert the masses to their plate worshipping, multiple wive having, non-oral sex having, caffeine free lifestyle.

What?  They were tired of going to the Las Vegas Bowl???  Imagine that.  To be honest, I think this is a big dump on the Mountain West and for their football program may cause them to take a major step back and they’ll have a hard time filling out their schedule with many home games.  They think they’re Notre Dame and trust me, they’re no Notre Dame.  Teams aren’t going to bend over backwards to go to Provo, Utah so that their football team can be seen right after an episode of ’Mormon Wife Swap’.  I mean, have you seen those women?  Read the rest of this entry »

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CFB: A former booster is about to air some dirty laundry about “The U” in a tell all, jail house book

Nice mouse ears.

• Scorned prison bound con-man to tell all about alledged violations at “The U” in coming book…
• NCAA to wait to hear the “facts” first, but come on, we totally knew this was going on right???
• This shouldn’t hang over the ‘Canes program all season should it???

by Mike Zimmer, Buckeye

So a con-man in prison in New Jersey that is responsible for the loss of over $80-million bucks in a $900-million dollar Ponzi scheme is set to reveal all sorts of dirty laundry about the Miami Hurricanes football program in a book…he’s writing…from jail.  Apparently scorned after many of the athletes he gave cash and did favors for while they were at ‘The U’ pretty much ignored him and blew him off once they became pros, this dude is about to boo-hoo the truth (http://collegefootballtalk.nbcsports.com/2010/08/29/new-book-to-allege-major-miami-violations-ncaa-on-standby/).

To be honest, this stinks of sour grapes but still, it’s funny and interesting at the same time.  While this sad dude in prison is probably full of stories about ‘The U’ from over the past 10-years and all the dirt that is probably there to be heard, the NCAA isn’t likely to take much of it seriously until it sees the light of day…in November.  Then, it will be discounted a bit because, well, after all this guy is a crook in prison now right? (http://www.sportsbybrooks.com/felon-who-stole-900m-ready-to-rat-out-the-u-28906)

What is great though is that perhaps this pall is cast over the entire Hurricanes season and it helps them slip up, especially when they come calling to Columbus on September 11th.  Maybe some of the dirty hands are still on the team and it will affect their play.  The ‘Canes have come a long way repairing their image from the days of Jimmy Johnson and the thug-style in which that zoo operated.  Heck, I’d go so far to say that Randy Shannon has actually done a decent job down in Coral Gables.  However, this is kind of par for the course for a program you know is always dirty with a capital D.

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CFB: The last dance for the Wiggity-wiggity-WAC??? WAC Preview brought to you by Club Fred Leisure Sports

Boise State’s Kellen Moore and Nevada’s Colin Kaepernick lead the offensive attacks in the soon to be dis-banded WAC.

• Boise State tries once again to make it to the big time, set for possible National Title chase while also readying to bolt to the Mountain West Conference…
• Nevada and Fresno State will be in the hunt right behind them, also following in their foot steps up the ladder to greener football pastures in the MWC…
• Is this the last dance for the wild and wily WAC for college football as their top teams get ready to bail out???  What then becomes of the orphans who are left???

by Mike Zimmer, College football expert

The path for the Boise State Broncos from Division I-AA power house to perennial BCS busting outsider has been swift.  They are once again poised to be knocking on the BCS’s door for a possible National Title run from the wild fringes of college football in the bastard child of the BCS–the WAC.  All the while, they and a few other teams will flee the WAC at season’s end and join the Mountain West, assuring they’ll get a BCS invite once that league is recognized as a big boy by the asinine college football say-so’s.

But, this is the year they might have it all put together to make a push for that title.  And it won’t be the first time they’ve been here and done that, after all, Boise State tied the all-time record for best record in a season with the 2002 National Title winning Ohio State Buckeyes with 14-wins including a perfect (8-0) swing through the weak WAC.  They beat fellow wanton BCS buster TCU (also at the time undefeated) but still got no recognition as champion of anything due to the silly BCS.  They’ll bolt the WAC next year to join TCU in the Mountain West, therefore eliminated the BCS’s ability to just throw the step-kids up against one another again.

This year they have a shot, but their first game is against Virginia Tech in Landover, Maryland which could be the stumble out of the gate that keeps them and the rest of the WAC teams out of the national spot-light this year.  After Boise State, the league is improved again this year with Nevada and exciting QB Colin Kaepernick nipping at their heals (they’ll host Boise State November 26th) and tough as nails Fresno State and head coach Pat Hill who is looking to return the Bulldogs to glory (who visit Boise November 19th).

Hit the jump for more and the predictions of KegeratorNation.com…but not before noting that this article and all college football previews are brought to you by…

CLUB FRED LEISURE SPORT’S MINI-CORNHOLE!!!

PREDICTIONS and PREVIEWS AFTER THE JUMP

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CFB: Conference USA preview (brought to you by Club Fred Leisure Sports and Mini Corn Hole!!!)

Yep, this is about all you need to know about Conference USA…oh and maybe…

Houston QB Case Keenum.

• Houston and their QB Case Keenum carry the conference flag for C-USA, could bust into the Top-25…
• Power in the conference resides in the strong West Division while the East re-builds…
• I’ll take Houston over Southern Miss in the C-USA title game.

by Mike Zimmer, College Football Expert

Conference USA is on the up-swing, but this season is about one team that really has a shot at breaking into the Top 25, the Houston Cougars.  With Heisman hopeful QB Case Keenum, the Cougars also have a schedule that makes it conducive for a shot at busting into the limelight.  It won’t matter even if it does happen though, the winner of this conference is slated to go to the Liberty Bowl against the 3rd rate opponent or like team from another lesser conference.

In the meantime, the C-USA line-up has some as many as 6-teams that could make the post-season andbowl games with Southern Miss, Central Florida and SMU most likely to repeat such trips.  On the other hand, there are some seriously dreadful teams in this league and a few teams that are set to re-build like East Carolina who lost not only their head coach in Skip Holtz, but over 30-lettermen including 16 of 22 starters from a season ago.

All of this of course is brought to you by Club Fred Leisure Sports and their fine product Mini Corn Hole!  Order yours today at club.fred.leisure.sports@gmail.com

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CFB: Do the Buckeyes have an East German women’s shot-putter on the offensive line and does this improve their Title IX status in sports?

Dude looks like a lady.  Ohio State O-lineman J.B. Shugarts.

• It would seem that a former East German women’s track star is playing Offensive Tackle for the Buckeyes…
• J. B. Shugarts better be one heck of a lineman or else the talk of him being “soft” are going to get louder…
• Does this mean that the Buckeyes football program is Title IX tight???

by Mike Zimmer, Buckeye

This was a funny note on SportsbyBrooks.com and even though it picks a bit at a player on my beloved Ohio State Buckeyes, it’s still worth noting.  I present to you J.B. Shugarts and his, well…not-so-manly look for picture day.  Nice barets there buddy.  You look like a 17-year old East German women’s track hopeful.  (http://www.sportsbybrooks.com/footballs-preseason-always-engenders-curiosity-28822).

Shugarts is 6’7 and right at 300lbs., so I would assume that treading lighting in regards to criticising his look would probably be a good idea.  I don’t care if this chick does have a vagina either, as long as she can block and keep Terrelle Pryor upright.

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